ZARA

You have sparked within me a love for prose, a lens of rose-tinted glasses through which to view the world, and the vocabulary of nature. Without you, I would not  have moved an inch and would have clung quietly to an ordinary era of living. You have crafted me in a way: I have learned to let petals become my language, blossoms become my thoughts, and the whispers of nature become the voice of my heart. ~Zara 

The shadow of farewell has turned every joy with you into pain. The shared moments of boundless joy are trailed by the mere thought of your absence. Your spirit unstitches my existence and holds sway over every fiber of my being. Your presence, so deeply woven into my identity, is resisting every inch of thought that parts us. The flowing days have already witnessed refusal, the eclipse of presence, the descent of darkness, and ultimately the dread of love becoming a memory. Unsettling my core has remained your favorite pastime, as though you find a quiet delight in watching me settle for nothing but the lingering essence of you. ~Zara

You bring forth the finest poetic prose writer in me, writing about my daily imaginary conversations with you or with God about you, yet I hate writing about you like this. I wish for nothing but your quiet presence before my eyes while I slowly unfold every secret and heart's desire I carry in silence. I dream of the day when I will behold your very being and tell you every single thing I have borne in my heart for you.  ~Zara

I carry countless conversations to God about you; I tell Him how sweetly you have adorned every thread of my being even when your soul was far from mine. I take my silence to the Divine and let him discern the joy you once put in my soul, though my eyes speak but my lips falter. My eyes translate what my lips cannot, reaching the deepest chamber of my soul, where tears surrender without resistance. He, the knower of my every unspoken truth, my secret keeper, is aware of the deep affection my heart bears for you. I am intoxicated by your name; merely speaking it overwhelms me. Every midnight, my spirit turns to the Eternal, eyes awash with emotions, prayer on lips struggling to become words, and holding onto the hope that a single KUN from Him may reshape the destiny my heart longs for. Every moment of despair deepens my dependence on hope, for I see it the only mean by which my soul survives. ~Zara

Lone morning strolls beneath the trees, with birds singing and the leaves whispering; the solace of greenery; and at the back of my mind, there was you. Recalling every bit of what we shared, our endless laughter, love-filled gazes, and unspoken emotions. The moments that made us whole, filled my life with joy, and gave even the quietest hours a reason to breathe.  ~ Zara 

No vocabulary has learned the shape of the feeling your smallest tenderness awakens within my very being. Moments unfolding almost unexpectedly, honeyed words, and your velvet-like emotions mend every unseen fracture within me. Those moments gather every scattered piece of me and returns it to where it has always belonged. You stir my soul with feelings it has never experienced before. ~Zara 

I will fail to remember. I will cut adrift. I will tear apart a piece of you within me. But I will still dream. I will create fantasies of you and me,  together, sitting side by side,  holding unto each other's souls, Our eyes speaking  while words failing to align,  listening to each other's heartbeats, and adoring every moment of us together, every midnight, in my dreams.  Zara